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Monthly Archives: March 2009

Mar 31 2009

The Haves and the Have Nots

by Holly

400happiness2

I used to have this pink tee shirt when I was a kid that had a big, glittery iron-on patch emblazoned on it. In between an up arrow and a down arrow were the words “Everything’s going up but my allowance.”

I hated that shirt, mostly because I didn’t get an allowance. Now, to be fair, I didn’t do anything around the house to warrant an allowance. But still, the grown-ups all thought the tee shirt was hilarious and adorable. I just felt like an impostor and did everything I could to avoid wearing that ridiculous shirt. All it did was remind me what I did not have, which made me feel different. And when you’re nine years old, different is not good.

I spent many years of my life thinking that more was better. More toys. More clothes. More friends. More books. More rooms. More vacations. More money. In a literal sense, I was pretty well off. But figuratively speaking I felt poor. Even when I had plenty, it didn’t feel like enough.

Enough for whom?

A few years (and a few thousand down dogs) ago, it finally started to make sense: stuff does not equal happiness. Simple but true. It’s hard to keep sight of that when everyone I know seems to have jetted off somewhere tropical this winter, or is dressed in a new pair of designer jeans, or heading out for dinner and drinks. Stuff does Not. Equal. Happiness.

It’s why I could have a cashmere sweater in every color that J.Crew offers, or a love-it size scoop of Cold Stone Creamery’s Founder’s Favorite ice cream (in a waffle bowl) every day of the week and still want for something more. Less is more. The less I want and the less I try to “keep up,” the more fulfilled I feel. Simple as that. And if I can find someone who will appreciate my unneeded things–stuffed bunny rabbits, a freshwater pearl necklace, a box full of holiday decorations, and so on–well, that’s what good karma housekeeping is all about.

I watched Michael J. Fox speak on Oprah today about what it’s like living with a degenerative disease. Something he said stood out to me so much that I hit pause and rewind a few times just so I could scribble it all down:

Happiness grows in direct proportion to your acceptance and in inverse proportion to your expectations. . . . This is what I have today. I don’t have a choice about this, but I have a million other choices. And if I choose well, I am going to be a happy person.

If the only real way to find happiness is to accept the reality that is today and fill it with the best option for whatever choices are in your control, well that’s what living rich is all about.

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© 2009 Good Karma Housekeeping. Because less really is more.

Categories: Happiness, Quotations | No Comments »

Mar 30 2009

Better Late Than Never, Right?

by Holly

victrola

I had brunch today with an old college friend whom I haven’t seen in a dozen years. And as we stood in line giving each other the abridged version of our lives post-college, I pulled out a CD from my bag that I had borrowed from her in 1995.

We had a good laugh about it, and she had always wondered what happened to it–not remembering whom she had lent it to. What happened to it was that I liked it. A lot. So, I listened to it over and over again throughout our senior year. And then, in 1996 when we graduated and went our separate ways, that CD got swept up in my own collection and made its way back to Connecticut with me. Intentional or not, I cannot remember, but I never forgot whom I borrowed it from. I knew our paths would cross again sometime, so I just held onto it. Sure I could have sent it, but the look on her face, all these years later, was priceless.

Better late than never, right? At least CD technology is still around . . .

(The coveted CD: The Angel in the House by Jonatha Brooke’s old duo, The Story.)

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© 2009 Good Karma Housekeeping. Making the space–both mentally and physically–to live happily ever after.

Categories: Borrowing | No Comments »

Mar 27 2009

Four Stuffed Bunnies (and a Bumble Bee)

by Holly

Adorable, right?

When I was in my mid/late 20s, my father gave me a stuffed bunny, along with some fancy chocolates, four Easters in a row. I secretly loved that, despite being all grown up, the mythical holiday bigwigs still had their part in my life. However, I felt a bit silly putting my floppy-eared toys on display. I’m just not that kind of girl.

True to my father’s good taste in gifts, these were some rather lovely bunnies. Adorable and girly and tea party-worthy. But each year, as the Easter holiday season passed, I would tuck my newest acquisition into a blue plastic storage bin, figuring that someday I’d be able to find them a proper home.

Enter, Craigslist.

I posted an ad looking for someone to help me give these bunnies a new home. And per usual, I wanted to know why they were interested in my bunnies. They may be stuffed animals, but they my stuffed animals, and were given with love. They needed to go to the right home.

I received a few inquiries, but only one felt right. It was from a gentleman from Wellesley, who had a two-year-old granddaughter named Chloe, with a sibling on the way. He assured me that his granddaughter would give my old bunnies the love a stuffed animal deserves (and that Chloe’s mother would ensure they remained well cared for). Sold.

Fast-forward to noon today, when Bob, the gentleman from Wellesley, met me in front of my workplace. I handed over a Nordstrom shopping bag full bunnies (and one tiny little stuffed bumble bee that had come from my mother), and he presented me with a bouquet of tulips and daffodils as a thank you. Such a pleasant little surprise that totally brightened my day.

Just goes to show, random acts of kindness are indeed contagious . . .

flowers

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© 2009 Good Karma Housekeeping. Making the space–both mentally and physically–to live happily ever after.

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Mar 18 2009

Just Do It: Clear the Clutter

by Holly

timer - 15 minutes

Decluttering FOO (Friend of Oprah) Peter Walsh claims all you need is 15 minutes a day, every day, to wrangle the piles around your house. The charmingly downhome FlyLady swears by the 27-Fling Boogie to rid yourself of all the junk that’s bogging you down. Even my kindergarten teacher, Miss Panda, had a quick, effective technique that she called Chipmunk Clean-Up to get us to put away all the crayons, books, puzzles, and blocks that we had scattered about.

All three had the same idea: just do it. Chop chop. No dilly-dallying. All too often, however, I’ll get sidetracked in my cleaning pursuits–simply because I don’t have a plan of attack. I see messes, I see piles, I see some really boring tasks ahead of me and my instinct is to see what’s on HGTV. Maybe if I watch just one (more) show about other people’s houses, then I’ll be inspired to tackle the clutter.

So, tonight, I turned on some rousing music, set the kitchen timer for 15 minutes, and went to it. I emptied the dishwasher, washed the pots, loaded the new round of dirty dishes, recycled that red wine vinegar bottle from three days ago, put last week’s grocery list and some random receipts in the recycling bin, gave the stovetop a quick scrub and the countertops a wipe down, put away two pairs of my boots and three pairs of shoes, folded the reusable grocery bags, and yes–dear FlyLady–I even shined my sink. (To her standards, no, but anything is better than nothing, right?)

All in 15 minutes? Well, not quite. I tacked another 8 minutes onto the timer, but the kitchen is pretty darn spiffy right now, if I do say so myself.

So, what are you waiting for? Go clear the clutter–one pile at a time.

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© 2009 Good Karma Housekeeping. Making the space–both mentally and physically–to live happily ever after. (image from The Household Helper)

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Mar 17 2009

Snowflake, the Fluffy White Teddy Bear

by Holly

Christmas Day, 1983

Let me start by saying that I have always believed stuffed animals have feelings. That when the stuffins are inserted at the toy factory, a little bit of spirit and soul gets mixed in, too. So, when I found the following note attached to my beloved old teddy bear, Snowflake (a.k.a. Oatmeal), up to his armpits in a garbage bag, my heartstrings were tugged and my reaction was a mixture of laughter and tears.

Dear Holly (please read this when we are alone),

With every visit here at Grandma’s home, she fluffs me up and plunks me in the corner of your sleeping area. I think she realizes just how much you mean to me and therefore does not resign me to the basement or worse yet, the dumpster. However, this new outfit she has fitted me with, tells me she may do just that.

My one and only dream would be for you to take me home with you and find a purpose for me once again so I may enjoy my existence. I remember the day my loving Grandma and Grandpa found me and Freckle on a high shelf in Macy’s department store. They immediately knew we would be loved by you and Uncle Jimmy. That brought such joy to my heart and I couldn’t wait for Christmas Morning! I loved your little arms around me and will forever let that memory warm my heart.

Grandma has told me that you have someone else to snuggle with these days and I am happy for you. I realize I am dusty and have dirty spots on me and am no longer desirable. It would mean so much to me if you would take me home and give me a bath so I can smell nice again. Maybe you could put me on the internet and find a young person who would love me the way you used to. Or, maybe Teddy or Inky would like to lay on top of me and love me in their own way. I just want to feel needed, and Grandma just uses me as a pillow sometimes. She sometimes hugs me, but I think she just feels sorry for me. I want to be special to someone. Will you help me? If you scrub me up it will take years off of me and I just know someone will love me again. I promise not to be any trouble.

Thank you for reading this Holly, and I hope with all my heart that you will please take me home and help me find someone to love me. It is why I was created and I can’t tell you how lonely I am.

All my love,

Oatmeal

I drove back to Boston that weekend with Snowflake in my passenger seat, crafting in my head the ad I would post on Craigslist to find my old bear a new home in time for Christmas. Before unloading my bags, I carried Snowflake into the house with my arms wrapped around his belly. My boyfriend was amused and promptly re-named the long-limbed fella the Snow Monkey.

For a good month or so, Snowflake (a.k.a. Oatmeal or the Snow Monkey) held court in the living room, patiently waiting for me to take the next step. He needed a bath. There was a drop of barbecue sauce stuck in his fur and decades of dust had turned him a dingy shade of snow reminiscent of March. I was caught between wanting to keep him for my own and finding him a new loving home.

Come early December, with the tree all adorned and the holiday season upon us, I carried Snowflake upstairs to the bathroom and bathed him with OxyClean and a washcloth, ever so gently, removing the past that clung to his exterior, readying him for a new set of loving arms.

December 2008, all clean and ready for his new home

Snowflake found his new home via Craigslist quite quickly, as you might expect of a handsome guy such as he. I received numerous requests for him, but the one that immediately stood out as being just right came from a teacher at Winthrop Middle School who works in a therapeutic classroom. She explained that many of her students are healing from trauma and sometimes find solace in just sitting with a stuffed animal in their arms. Sold. I packed Snowflake up the very next day and overnighted him to the school, where he arrived just in time for their annual family holiday party.

So, just as my parents had been warmed by visions of their children wrapping their arms wrapped around these two big fluffy teddy bears, I, too, feel a swell in my heart knowing this bear still has many more hugs to come.

P.S., I regret to inform you that Freckle, my brother’s teddy bear, eventually bought the farm. But only after years and years of being snuggled, drooled upon, and used as a pillow. I suppose that’s a pretty good life for a teddy bear to lead, too.

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© 2009 Good Karma Housekeeping. Making the space–mentally and physically–to live happily ever after.

Categories: Formerly Mine | 1 Comment »

The Haves and the Have Nots

Better Late Than Never, Right?

Four Stuffed Bunnies (and a Bumble Bee)

Just Do It: Clear the Clutter

Snowflake, the Fluffy White Teddy Bear

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